Fifth Sunday of Easter 'C'

Sunday May 2, 2010

Love is all ya need!

I’m not exactly the ‘touchy-feely’ type and my family has never been overly demonstrative in expressing our love for one another. However, we do send lots of cards and notes and of course, always add “Love” or “Love to all” to our signature. I always sign my name, “Love, Ken” accompanied by a sketch of a large heart with a smiling face in the middle

In whatever manner we end our conversations or sign our cards, I think it is true to say that most of us offer a hug and a kiss to our loved ones before departing on a journey. It’s not that we do not expect to see one another again but it is an assurance that we will remain connected and that our bond will endure despite the separation of time and space or a hurricane now and then.

John the Evangelist has recorded for us Jesus’ final words of farewell, his “Love ya” speech, as it were. Of course John has “reconstructed” Jesus’ farewell address and prayer on the style used by prominent leaders of those times. He did not necessarily put words in Jesus’ mouth but more than likely interpreted Jesus’ message for those he was leaving behind and for their posterity. But Jesus also added a new commandment—that his disciples love one another. “Such as my love has been for you, so must your love be for one another.”

I suppose our farewells contain the same entreaties at least non-verbally. We want our loved ones to stay connected. However, Jesus strengthened that request by telling them and us that this is in fact “how all will know that you are my friends: your love for one another.”

Without offense, I hope, I have often teased my co-workers and friends about their frequent use of the phrase “Love ya”. It is meant as a gentle reminder that these words can become rote and, over time, lose their meaning. The word “love” has many meanings and applications. Even the phrase “making love” has come to mean, “having sex.” But having sex can become merely an act of self-gratification rather than a true expression of love. Of course it is true that genuine expressions of love are rarely free of self-gratification and they are not necessarily incompatible. Someone has observed, wisely, that even the sacrifices of saints though divinely driven are not completely free of self-interest. Nevertheless familiarity with the word and its physical expressions can lead to a dulling of its depth of meaning and its transforming power.

At this time of the year, I find the nurturing of plants a useful metaphor for the caring love of one person for another. Every plant has its unique quality and its special needs. A cactus does not want a lot of water in the winter but it does need plenty of sunshine all year round. It takes a while to get to know the ‘personal needs’ of some plants. Some are more introverted than others. I have several plants with which I converse on a daily basis. I nurture their life and attempt to give them what they need but first I listen. If I don’t give them what they need, they die. Does that sound strange? I hope not. Love means listening first to what the other is saying and then listening carefully to what the other is not saying. Listening not just with the ears but with the heart is the key to love. A good book was written many years ago with the title, “How do I learn to listen to what you are not saying.” Very interesting!

Introverts need privacy and lots of space; extroverts don’t know what they are thinking until they talk it out. Some folks like to dream and others prefer to celebrate the present moment. Some people like to organize their lives and the lives of others while others prefer to float through life as if to say, “Lets see what happens!” As the sidewalk psychologist said, “there are different strokes for different folks!” How true.

God listens to us in Christ. God doesn’t decide life for us but with us. God offers us a listening ear and an understanding heart so that God can give us what we need to be our best selves. God does not control us but animates us and empowers us to listen to others, doing for them whatever enables them to be their best selves. This is what it means to “love one another as I have loved you!”

We can even take this a step beyond family and friendships to the human community at large. God’s love also empowers us to justice. As faithful disciples, we need to listen to the cries of humanity—to the poor in Haiti and in troubled spots across the globe and to those on the edges of life that we may respond with the transforming love of God for humanity.

Listening is a real stretch because all too often we are tempted to answer questions that are not being asked or respond to our own needs or to what we think others “should” want.

I have strong memories of my time in ministry to the ‘inner city’ of Paterson in the days of so-called urban renewal. Instead of listening to the indigenous population at the core of the city, political leaders decided they knew what the city folks needed. The end result was the construction of a new police headquarters, fire stations, cosmetic lampposts and curbing. This is not to suggest that these were not in need of repair or replacement. However, the basic survival of the people surely should have come first.

And love is never a cover-up or evil or a denial of wrong-doing. True love means saying “I’m sorry” when I offend—not, “I’m sorry if I have offended you!”

Back in November of 1968, the Beatles’ pop hit attempted to sing it in a few words albeit repetitiously, “All ya need is love…” I think they were not exactly on the same page as John 3:16 and I had the feeling that they spelled it ‘LUV’ instead of love. On the other hand, perhaps that’s the correct spelling. “To love another is to see the face of God!”

“God is love and those who abide in love, abide in God and God in them.”

I have heard that there is a series of billboards on a certain highway in Arizona – of all places!— on which drivers will find these messages from God:

“Tell the kids I love them.”—God
“Let’s meet at my house next Sunday before the game.”—God
“We need to talk.” —God
“That ‘Love they neighbor thing… I really meant it.” —God
“I love you, and you, and you and you…”—God
“Will the road you are on get you to my place?”—God
“Make someone’s day brighter today and tell them I was asking for them.”—God

“I give you a new commandment” again for the first time! “Love one another … as I have loved you.”

“Love is all ya need!” no matter how you spell it.

Luv ya!

PS I am in the process of a move from Apt 2-E to Apt 3-V. This will necessitate a reinstallation of my internet connection and may result in a hiatus service. Therefore, I will not provide any daily postings during the coming week.

Father Lasch


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